I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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