I can text with my tongue
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
