We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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