Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
