so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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