Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
