My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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