I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
My pussy is not your playground.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
then he tried to convert me to islam
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize