Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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