He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
