Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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