It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
