I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
