ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Randomize
