just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
i dont even know how to be here
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
You've changed since you got that strap on
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