idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
