I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
