My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Randomize
