Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
