You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
