Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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