lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
