I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
that's an acceptable place to lick
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Randomize
