ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
