I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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