so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize