and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
