In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
