can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
