Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
