Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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