In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize