Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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