you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
this hospital has no fireball
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
