Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
