brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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