my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
