all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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