Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
