Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
