i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Randomize
