arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize