Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
