thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
