I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
