Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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