I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize