If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
