Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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