i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
